The following is an article I read in the Bradley News Weekly. I copied it here exactly
as it was in the paper.
How Much Do YOU Know About Computers?
This is the actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect
Customer Support employee:
"Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help
you?" "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect." "What sort of
trouble?" "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went
away." "Went away?" "They disappeared." "Hmm. So what does your screen
look like now?" "Nothing." "Nothing?" "It's blank; it won't accept
anything when I type." "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?" "Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?" "What's
a sea-prompt?" "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
"Does your monitor have a power indicator?" "What's a monitor?" "It's the
thing with the screen on it that's looks like a TV. Does it have a little light
that tells you when it's on?" "I don't know." "Well, then look on the
back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see
that?" ... "Yes, I think so." "Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and
tell me if it's plugged into the wall." ... "Yes, it is." "When you were
behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the
back of it, not just one?" "No." "Well, there are. I need you to look back
there again and find the other cable." ... "Okay, here it is." "Follow it
for me, and tell me if it's plugged into the back of the computer." "I can't
reach." "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?" "No." "Even if you maybe
put your knee on something and lean over?" "Oh, it's not because I don't have
the right angle - it's because it's dark." "Dark?" "Yes - the office light
is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window." "Well, turn
on the office light then." "I can't." "No? Why not?" "Because there's
a power outage." "A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked
now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came
with?" "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet." "Good! Go get them, and
unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it
back to the store you bought it from." "Really? Is it that bad?" "Yes, I'm
afraid it is." "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."
